No more excuses for my failures as a mother…It’s time to get some “mom skills”!!Posted by Karmel Larson on Jan 16, 2017 in Faith, Mama Karmel, Motherhood, Teach Fearlessly | Comments Off on No more excuses for my failures as a mother…It’s time to get some “mom skills”!!
Yes, I’m thinking like…
Napoleon Dynamite style mom skills!!!
I need better “skills” as a mother and I intend to do something about it. 2017 is my year to “Master Motherhood!” (or at least make some serious improvements) I have to thank a good Lutheran woman for posting this insightful article, calling for mothers to stop whining, step up their game and get some skills.
Specifically, I was troubled by and moved to action by this statement,
“Women …have bought into a peculiarly destructive myth. What is this myth? ….It is the idea that anything they do not know how to do cannot be done.
They do not know how to get their toddler to come when called. Therefore, toddlers aren’t controllable. They do not know how to stay caught up with the laundry and the grocery shopping. Therefore, the life of a mom is inherently a crazy cycle of unfair drudgery. They have tried—perhaps tried hard—and given up. They have decided that, like labor and delivery, all of motherhood is something to be waited out.
Rather than considering the idea that their lives could perhaps be better if they would only learn new skills and habits (or, more radically, that perhaps contemporary models of childrearing and housekeeping have failed them and they ought to seek help from different, older sources)…”
Her words cut to my core and I realized that I am guilty of having tried and failed at many aspects of motherhood and parenting and rather than seeking out a mentor or solutions or “skills”, I have made excuses. And rightfully so… I have ALOT of valid excuses. I have ALOT of children, I have ALOT of responsibilities. My cup runneth over with blessings which I could label as excuses… and I think most people would graciously agree with me that I deserve a “pass” on many things begging for improvement because of this or that excuse…. ENOUGH EXCUSES!!!
It’s time to act! Benjamin Franklin said,
“All mankind is divided into three classes: those that are immovable, those that are movable, and those that move.”
I want to be a mover! So I’m looking for help… I need helpers, who like me, want to be “movers and shakers” to shake up their home routines and improve their skills (kitchen skills, laundry skills, garden skills, discipline skills, education skills, marriage skills, time management skills….). I need help, so I’m seeking out the best mentors I can find. I’m going to hunt them down, invite them to teach me and try my hardest to be their best student. I’m seeking living examples as well as angel mothers who’ve already passed, books, articles, websites and discussion with other mothers.
I recently learned about the The National Monument to the Forefathers, formerly known as the Pilgrim Monument. It is thought to be the largest granite monument in the world and is a commemoration piece honoring the Mayflower Pilgrims and their sacrifices to find freedom to live their religion. The monument was dedicated on August 1, 1889, and honors the vision of our forefathers as a recipe for preserving freedom in our nation.
The main statue is “Faith”. The virtue upon which all freedom rests. The four seated statues below Faith represent Morality, Law, Education, and Liberty. You can read about their symbolism at the ProvinceFoundation.com. Education is represented by a mother.
From www.provincefoundation.com, we learn the symbolism of this statue, preserved as a message by our forefathers…
“Education in America for the first few centuries was centered in the home, because everyone believed it was the right and responsibility of parents to govern the education of their children. A statue to the Pilgrim Mother in Plymouth, Massachusetts, bears the inscription: “They brought up their families in sturdy virtue and a living faith in God, without which nations perish.” The American home passed on the faith and virtue necessary for liberty. To our founders, the most important aspect of education was to impart Christian character, to shape the inner man. Upon this foundation they taught a worldview deeply rooted in the Bible that provided instruction for all spheres of life. These ideas are reflected in the monument.
The statue of Education is holding an open book of knowledge (the Bible) implying its truth must be passed to all. Flanking her throne are two carved reliefs; one is Youth (the object of the parents instruction) and the other Wisdom (represented by a grandfather) pointing to the commands and an open Bible, with the world at his feet. The family, both parents and grandparents, were to teach the youth how the world works from a Biblical perspective. Education is wearing a wreath of victory, which is obtained when children are well-instructed in the Lord.”
I want to be worthy of such a crown, “obtained when children are well-instructed in the Lord”.
This is my year to “master mothering” in such a way that my own children will seek for a similar home environment and desire to also raise up their own children to be “well-instructed in the Lord” and carry forth the vision of freedom and faith that our nation was founded upon.
No more excuses… time to get moving and improve my skills.
*If you are local to Utah Valley, you can join me in my quest to improve, each first Thursday. I have invited some mothers to come and share ideas together as we study motherhood each month. I’ve created a study table of resources for the year divided by topics, into months. Some things we’ll discuss will be:
- Seeking revelation to partner with God in our effort to “Master Motherhood”.
- Mentor Mothers (deceased and living)
- We’ll start with the new essay from LDS.org on Heavenly Mother
- We’ll have guest speakers on certain topics
- We will learn from living mothers who have “obtained the wreath of victory”!
- Marriage and how to partner with our spouse in our mothering efforts
- Power of Positive Parenting by Glenn Latham
- Mother Education lessons from LDS.org
- LDS Conference talks and articles on motherhood
- Websites pertaining to motherhood
- Specific skills – laundry, dishes, potty training, organizing, time management, cooking, gardening, preparedness, ironing, cleaning, finances, etc!
For those interested in healthy cooking, there will also be a Whole Foods Plant Based potluck prior to each meeting at 6pm for discussion on health and nutrition for families.
RSVP at http://mamakarmel.com/mom-ed/